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Our children watch the way we interact with other people and then they copy that behavior. It should not come as a surprise if at some point and time we hear our words repeated from their lips.
If we cannot control ourselves then how can we control and be a positive influence in the lives of our children.
Many of us have a "do as I say do and not as I do" attitude. But is this a realistic expectation.
The mixed signals will chip away at your credibility with the child because they see the contradiction.
There was a time when adults felt the need to discuss sensitive issues would ask the children to leave the room. Today, this may not always be the case. Infact, parents may find themselves having to explain the behavior of others.
How often do we forget to say the simple words "I'm sorry"? It is not uncommon these days to be scoffed at for doing so.
Eventhough, this may not be happening in your home, here is just a short list of bad manners and behavior we expose our children to either at home, from peers or environmental influences.
Rudeness
* Bumping into others without saying excuse me.
* Accepting courtesies from others without saying thankyou
Abuse and Aggressive Behavior
* Parents abusing each other verbally or physically
* Verbal or threatening physical abuse to a teacher that gives negative feedback about your child
* Bullying and terrorizing people to get what you want.
Defense and Indifference to Inappropriate Behavior
* Making statements like "I'm grown I do what I want to do".
* Laughing at cruelty to others and pets.
* Bad work habits like constant lateness or absenteeism.
* Lying to get out of difficult situations or for personal gain.
* Stealing in front of the child.
Bad Judgement
* Engaging in intimacy infront kids.
* Lacking stability in relationships with members of the opposite sex.
* Coming home drunk.
* Smoking Marijuana or taking other illegal drugs in the presence of children
* Using the B word to refer to women
* Confrontations with the police
Children's Peers
Parents are not the only source of a child's bad behavior. A child's peers also have a great influence over what they internalize. If a child wants to be accepted by peers, they may do whatever is necessary to become a part of the group.
The Media
Our media can play a role in influencing our children's thought process through the images and messages it sends to a young and impressionable world.
Some under estimate the role of television, movies and music on young minds. However, I beg to differ. In our times we have seen movies with children using cuss words that would even make a sailor blush.
Living in a society where we frequently debate issues like freedom of speech: Would it not be wise to exercise this right with prudence and temperance for the sake of our children.
Conclusion
Parents have the ability to become heroes in the eyes of their children. By building trust and respect,
you can become the person whose character fills the chalice from which they drink.
